I’ll skip defining boredom. It’s so common that it doesn’t need definition, any more than hunger or sunlight. Nearly everyone feels bored at one time or another, more or less often, sometimes daily. Men, in general, are more often bored than women. And people with little education are more likely to report being bored. As with nearly everything, there are two sides to boredom.
Sometimes it’s hard to tell if they’re bored or if they’re just being dogs.
1. MonotonyintheMind — When people are not interested in the details of the task at hand, or when a task is highly repetitive, they are likely to feel bored. We lose interest in things that are too predictable, too much of the same thing, too little stimulation. This can often lead to feeling trapped.
Piracy is just so dull sometimes.
2. LackofFlow — Flow is total immersion in a task that is challenging but within one’s abilities, a task with clear goals and immediate feedback. Tasks that are too easy are boring. Tasks that seem to be too difficult may lead to anxiety.
3. Need for Novelty — People with a strong need for novelty, excitement, and variety—i.e., sensation seekers—are at risk of boredom. For these people, the world moves too slowly. The need for external stimulation may be why extroverts are particularly prone to boredom, which they try to cure by novelty seeking and risk-taking.
4. PayingAttention —What bores us never fully engages our attention. After all, it is hard to be interested in something when you cannot concentrate on it. People with chronic attention problems, such as attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, are more likely to suffer boredom.
5. Emotional Awareness — People who lack self-awareness are more prone to boredom, unable to articulate what it is that they desire or want to do. They have trouble describing their feelings. Not knowing what we are searching for means that we lack the capacity to choose appropriate goals.
6. InnerAmusementSkills — People who don’t have the inner resources to deal with boredom constructively rely on external stimulation. In the absence of inner amusement skills, the external world will always fail to provide enough excitement and novelty.
7. LackofAutonomy — People often feel boredom when they feel trapped. And feeling trapped—stuck or constrained so that one’s will cannot be executed—is a big part of boredom. Adolescents are often bored, largely because children and teenagers don’t have a lot of control over their schedules and activities.
8. The RoleofCulture — Boredom is a modern luxury. As the Enlightenment was giving way to the Industrial Revolution in the late 18th Century, boredom came into being. When people have to spend most hours of the days securing food and shelter, boredom isn’t an option.
The Upside of Boredom
Boredom does have its benefits. It is a “call to action.” Nietzsche suggested that men (sic) of rare sensibility value boredom as an impetus to achievement. So…
1. Boredom can be a catalyst for action.
2. It can provide an opportunity for thought and reflection, a search for life’s meaning.
3. It can also be a sign that a task is a waste of time—and thus not worth continuing.
4. Boredom can spur creativity.
Challenges for writers:
Writing boredom in an engaging way
Choosing ways for characters to handle boredom that forward the plot
Milking boredom for tension and/or emotional acting out
Beware the Carnosaur Virus! from the movie Carnosaur
We are currently enduring a coronavirus pandemic (COVID-19). But perhaps I can tell you some things about pandemics in general that you don’t know!
Writers note: you will find below several bits of information you absolutely must have if you are going to write a story involving a pandemic—or even an epidemic.
ALZ-113 (Simian Flu) from Planet of the Apes
First you need to know the different levels of the disease’s severity within a community.
Sporadic: a disease that occurs infrequently and irregularly (rabies, polio)
Endemic: the constant presence and/or usual prevalence of a disease or infectious agent in a population within a geographic area (chicken pox in American schoolchildren, malaria in certain areas of Africa)
Hyperendemic: persistent, high levels of an endemic disease occurrence, above the expected “normal” levels
Disinfection of workers at an Ebola clinic, 2016
Epidemic: an increase, often sudden, in the number of cases of a disease above what is normally expected in that population in that area (Ebola in 2014, Zika in 2018)
Outbreak: carries the same definition of epidemic, but is often used for a more limited geographic area
Holoendemic: essentially every individual in a population is infected, though not all show symptoms (modern occurrences are not common, but one example is hepatitis B in some areas of the Marquesas Islands)
Cluster: aggregation of cases grouped in place and time that are suspected to be greater than the number expected, even though the expected number may not be known
Pandemic: is an epidemic so big it crosses international boundaries and affects large numbers of people.
Bubonic Plague
Squirrel Army!
Pandemics can occur in crops, livestock, fish, trees, or other living things, but I’ll be sticking with people here. You may want a plot line that has people battling a pandemic in another species. What happens to the food supply if all the wheat or corn or soybeans die off? How would people protect themselves from an entire population of aggressively rabid squirrels?
A wide-spread disease or condition that kills many people is a pandemic only if it is infectious. E.g., cancer and diabetes are not pandemics.
Until recently, I thought—in a vague sort of way—that pandemics were a thing of the past, mostly centuries ago. Wrong. Currently, besides COVID-19, HIV/AIDS is an active pandemic world-wide. For example, several African countries have infection rates as high as 25%, or even 29% among pregnant South African women.
Distribution of AIDS cases worldwide
Any given pandemic is seldom one-and-done. Maybe none of them are.
Black Death, Venetian miniature. Middle Ages, Italy, 14th century. (Photo by DeAgostini/Getty Images)
Seattle PD wearing newly distributed face masks to prevent the spread of respiratory disease
Plague: contagious bacterial diseases that cause fever and delirium, usually along with the formation of buboes, sometimes infecting the lungs. In past centuries, plagues killed 20%, 40%, even 50% of a country’s population. The first U.S. plague outbreak was the San Francisco plague of 1900-1904.
Writers note: isolated cases of plague still turn up in the western U.S.
Influenza (a.k.a. Flu): the first flu pandemic recorded was in 1580, and since then influenza pandemics have occurred every 10 to 30 years
Cholera: seems (to me) to be nearly perennial, with pandemics recorded 1871-1824, 1826-1837, 1846-1860, 1863-1875 (in 1866 it killed some 50,000 Americans), 1881-1896, 1899-1923, 1961-1975.
Typhus (a.k.a., camp fever, gaol fever, and ship fever): caused by bacterial Rickettsia prowazekii and characterized by a purple rash, headaches, fever, and usually delirium. It spreads rapidly in cramped quarters, often carried by fleas, lice, and ticks. It’s common in times of war and famine.
Smallpox: caused by the variola virus, it raged from the 18th century through the 1950s. Vaccination campaigns beginning in the 19th century led the World Health Organization to declare smallpox eradicated in 1979.
Writers note: it is the only human infectious disease to have been completely eradicated. But for your purposes, maybe not!
Measles: historically, before the vaccine was introduced in 1963, 90% of people had the measles by age 15. Measles is an endemic disease, so groups of people can develop resistance. But it is often deadly for those who get measles, and it has killed over 200 million people over the last 150 years. Worldwide, in 2000, measles killed 777,000 out of 40 million cases.
Tuberculosis(a.k.a, TB): a very present danger, as new infections occur at a rate of one per second. A quarter of the world’s current population has been infected, and although most of those are latent, 5-10% will progress to active disease. Left untreated, TB kills more than half of its victims.
Leprosy (Hansen’s disease): caused by a bacillus, it is a chronic disease. It has an incubation period up to five years, but it can now be cured. It’s been estimated that in the early 13th century, there were 19,000 leper hospitals (leprosariums) across Europe.
Malaria: widespread in tropical and subtropical regions around the world.
Writers note: consider the implications of climate change. Once common, malaria deaths became all but non-existent due to drug treatment. However, growing drug resistance is a major concern. Malaria is resistant to all classes of antimalarial drugs except artemisinins.
Yellow fever was vaguely understood to be carried by sailors on long voyages
Yellow fever: a viral infection carried by mosquitoes. In 1793, it killed approximately 10% of the population of Philadelphia.
Ebola virus: one of several viral hemorrhagic fevers (along with Lassa fever, Rift Valley fever, Marburg virus, and Bolivian hemorrhagic fever) that seem to be pandemics in waiting because they are highly contagious and deadly. On the other hand, transmission requires close contact and moves fast from onset to symptoms, so effective quarantines are possible.
And on the third hand, writers note: it could always mutate and adapt.
Coronaviruses: a large family of viruses that cause illnesses ranging from the common cold to MERS-CoV, SARS-CoV, and the current Coronavirus-19, which is a new strain of SARS-CoV-2. Common effects of all of these are fever, cough, shortness of breath, and breathing difficulties.
Historians have identified five (sometimes six) “major pandemics” that have affected enough of the population to cause a significant change in the social order. They are often referred to as plagues, despite not being caused by the bacterium Yersinia pestis.
The Plague of Justinian (541-543) continued to cause famine and death after the primary infection had been contained because the sudden lack of a labor force meant that crops weren’t planted and harvested.
The horrific conditions during and after the plague are believed to have created an ideal atmosphere for the rapid spread of Christianity.
Though he survived his infection, Emperor Justinian had to shelve plans to consolidate power and expand the Roman Empire.
Plague victim demonstrating a bubos
The Black Death of 1347 to 1351 is believed to have killed as much as half the world’s population.
Historians have estimated that resulting labor shortage allowed for the end of the feudal system and the beginning of the Renaissance in Europe.
The population of Greenland was so diminished that the Vikings didn’t have the manpower to continue their raids in North America.
The Colombian Exchange is a general term used to cover all of the species of plants, animals, people, and diseases moved from one continent to another during the European invasion of North and South America.
There is evidence that the extreme loss of life may even have caused a shift in global climates, because so much farmland and pasture land was abandoned and returned to forest.
Polio, hepatitis, encephalitis, and syphilis were transmitted to Europe from North and South America, sometimes introducing a more virulent strain than had previously been present.
The worst-hit areas of the Third Plague
Hong Kong
The Third Bubonic Plague began in 1855 and reached every part of the world before it died down in the 1960s.
Researchers confirmed that the disease was spread by bacteria in flea bites, allowing for major breakthroughs in quarantine methods.
Some of those early quarantines involved such draconian measures in colonized areas that they contributed to rebellions in Panthay, Taiping, and several regions of India.
Public information campaigns helped to reduce transmission
The 1918 Influenza outbreak, commonly known as the Spanish Flu, infected 500 million people around the world and killed more people than World War I. In 25 weeks, it killed more people than AIDS did in its first 25 years.
The close quarters of soldiers involved in World War I contributed to the rapid spread, but the contagion raised public awareness of how disease is transmitted and how to prevent it.
Note: The “Spanish” flu was present around the world, but it gained its name because the Spanish government did not censor information on the pandemic. Because most other countries worked to suppress information so as not to disrupt the war, people got the impression that the disease was coming from Spain, the source of their information.
Keith Haring, AIDS activist and artist
Though it was first reported in 1981, HIV/AIDS is believed to have originated in a mutated genetic strand of the virus from a monkey in the 1920s.
Sex education in schools and sexual practices among some portions of the population (notably among sex workers) changed drastically to focus on safety.
Because it was first prevalent among the gay community, many religious leaders claimed the virus was a divine sign that homosexuals were evil.
Leprosy hospitals still exist in India
“Alien” diseases are more deadly than local ones. Writers note: what are the implications of colonizing Mars?
Medieval dead cart
In 1529, a measles outbreak in Cuba killed 2/3 of the natives who had previously survived smallpox.
Malaria was a major threat to colonists and Native Americans when introduced to the Americas along with the slave trade.
In Colonial times, West Africa was called “the white man’s grave” because of malaria and yellow fever.
European explorers often had devastating effects on indigenous people—and vice versa. For example, some believe that the death of up to 95% of the Native American population of the new world was caused by old world diseases such as smallpox, measles, and influenza.
On the other hand, syphilis was carried from the new world to Europe after Columbus’ voyages.
Attempts to combat typhus after the liberation of Bergen-Belsen
Many notable epidemics and pandemics involve transmission from animals to humans, zoonoses.
Influenza/wild aquatic birds
SARS-CoV/civet cats
MERS-CoV/deomedary camels
COVID-19/bats’
Avian influenza (bird flu)/birds in Vietnam (a pandemic in waiting)
During the Third Plague, researchers definitively proved that flea bites spread Bubonic plague
Writing about pandemics—or any disease, actually, you need to decide on:
Disease type/ who’s most susceptible (childhood/ common/ rare)
Cause (bacteria, virus, parasite, fungus, imbalance of bodily humors, witchcraft, divine intervention, etc.)
Transmission (airborne, body fluids, food or water, touch, telepathy, miasma, etc.)
Virulence (how likely a person is to catch the disease after coming into contact with it)
Length of the incubation period: a person could be showing symptoms and become infectious almost instantly or it could take years
Symptoms of this disease
Whether it’s treatable and/or curable
How people react when they encounter someone with this disease
For a first-hand idea of what people thought during the Black Death, check out this Eyewitness to History!
Houses with sick inhabitants were marked for quarantine in London
BOTTOM LINE FOR WRITERS: pandemic are tried and true for creative fiction, whether historical or current, sci-fi or known world, mystery/action adventure or romance. Go for it!
Let’s end this on a more cheerful note: Happy Saint Patricks Day!
People who get the recommended eight hours of sleep in twenty-four are spending a third of their lives in bed. Granted, things other than sleep happen in bed, but it’s absolutely undeniable that people—and therefore realistic characters—go to bed, sleep more or less well, and get up often. Whether the sleeper spread-eagles across the bed or looks like a soldier at attention, a preferred sleep position can be indicative of character, personality, and even health issues.
Writers take note: it pays to pay attention to your protagonist’s sleep habits.
Sleeping Positions and What They Say About Personality
The Fetal Position is a favorite: 41% of all people habitually adopt this position at night. It involves curling your knees towards your chest, as if sleeping in the womb.
Secret Softy is the basic personality type associated with this position. This sleeping position means tough on the outside and soft on the inside. The person may be shy to begin with, though they usually open up and relax quite quickly.
Left-side sleepers tend to be creative and well-educated.
Right-side sleepers are more likely to smoke and depend on caffeine.
The Thinker—much like the fetal position—will sleep curled up but with a hand gently resting on the chin, as if pondering something.
The personality associated with this position is an Emotional Evaluator. Those who habitually sleep in this position are more emotional than other sleepers, with both positive and negative emotions running high.
The Log: 15% of people enjoy sleeping in the log position, the second most popular position. To snooze in this position, one sleeps on one side with both arms and legs straight. (It must be comfortable even if it doesn’t look it.)
Logs are Naturally Carefree people. But conventional wisdom says that those who tend to sleep like this also tend to be social butterflies, friendly, carefree, and popular.
Writers Note: A trusting nature means also likely to fall into the trap of being gullible.
The Yearner is also a common sleeping position that involves sleeping on one side with straight legs but arms stretched out, as if trying to reach something.
Such people are thought to be Complex Characters. People who sleep like this are a bit of a mixed bag, being both open-minded and cynical, inviting but suspicious of new friends and acquaintances.
“Yearners” tend to make good, reliable friends. Slow and deliberate decision makers, they are often unsure of their own decisions, though they have a firm resolve once they’ve come to a conclusion.
Soldier Stance, as the name implies, looks like a soldier sleeping at attention, lying on their back with arms straight by their sides.
Controlled Characters tend to sleep in this position. They will usually be strong, quiet, focused, and reserved.
They may also expect themselves and other people to adhere to strict moral codes and high standards.
The Freefall (also called The Skydiver) sleep position makes the sleeper look a relaxed skydiver freefalling through the sky, often with arms wrapped around a pillow while sleeping on their stomach.
Sleeping in freefall indicates someone who is bold, sociable, and fun, though they may not have the thick skin necessary to deal with criticism or uncomfortable situations.
They may be anxious, and seek control of situations.
Spread-Eagled Starfish (sometimes called Mattress Hog), the starfish sleeper spreads arms and legs in a carefree manner over the entire bed surface while lying face-up, is the least common position.
A starfish is likely to be a flexible friend, willing to listen to anyone who needs to talk or help anyone who needs a hand. Although unconventional, they probably don’t really like to be the center of attention.
The Stargazer position isn’t the most popular, possibly because it can mean the sleeper gets too cool overnight. The position is a vulnerable one, with stargazers lying on their backs, arms wrapped around their head.
They are likely to be the Best BFF’s, giving priority to their friends, doing everything they can for those they hold dear.
Usually, these sleepers will have a happy, easy-going disposition.
Pillow Huggers are self-described. They hug pillows close to their bodies, and usually have arms and legs wrapped around it in some way.
Pillow huggers like to get cosy and be cuddled, cherishing the relationships they have with the important people in their lives above all else.
Other Factors Related to Various Positions
Positional Side Effects
The Log
Some claim this position, aligning neck and back, makes it one of the best for back and neck pain; others point out the potential for arm numbness, as well as neck and shoulder pain for some people.
May also put pressure on hip joints, sometimes eased by a pillow between the knees.
The Soldier
Unless the sleeper uses too many pillows or sleeps on an uneven surface, this position aligns the neck and spine if not too many pillows. This position can distribute weight evenly across shoulders. Its relationships to acid reflux is unclear. Back sleepers are more prone to snoring, and those with sleep apnea can aggravate the condition by sleeping like this.
On the other hand, the effects of gravity means it can help prevent the development of wrinkles on beck and face. Dianna Ross once said she trained herself to sleep on her back for that very reason.
Another reason to train oneself to sleep in this position is to elevate or avoid aggravating injuries, such as broken arms, knee or ankle surgeries, abdominal sutures, shoulder strain, or any other painful event that may have happened to a character.
The Starfish
Also a flat back position, the starfish has the same side effects as the soldier. Only 8% of sleepers prefer back sleeping.
Back sleeping tends to lead to more refreshing sleep, with the least readjusting during the night. May be a good choice for people with arthritis.
On the other hand, it may aggravate back and neck pain. Back sleeping (keeping face off the pillow) may reduce acne breakouts.
Freefall/ Skydiver
Research suggests that this position is one of the worst for health because it puts strain on the neck, back, and spine. It increases the risk of neck and back pain as well as airway blockage. A sleeper can ease stress on neck, upper back, and airways by sleeping face down with a pillow under forehead.
On the plus side, it also has the the potential to ease snoring and sleep apnea.
Only 7% of people sleep on their stomach.
Side Sleepers
Side sleeping reduces snoring and relieves sleep apnea. It can reduce back and neck pain and carpal tunnel syndrome. Side sleeping helps the brain’s lymphatic system clear waste during sleep.
Side sleepers are more likely to develop face and neck wrinkles (compared to back sleepers). Consistently sleeping on one side can lead to noticeably asymmetrical wrinkling.
Sleeping on one’s side may lead to the down-side limbs “going to sleep.”
Which side matters:
Left side sleeping is helpful for acid reflux, and it may aid digestion.
Right side sleeping may lower nervous system activity, reducing heart rate and blood pressure.
Fetal Position
Sleepers in the fetal position have the fewest sleep interruptions.
It’s also the best position for back pain.
The Thinker shares side effects with the fetal position.
Age
With age, more people gravitate to a side-sleeping position. This may be related to protecting heart function during sleep.
As they get older, people move less drastically during the night, move less frequently, and spend more time in a position before moving on to another. Children shift sleep position more than twice as often during the night compared to those 65 and over.
Sleep position matters more with age. Older people are less flexible and more prone to stiffness and pain.
Gender
Twice as many women as men tend to sleep in the fetal position.
Pregnant women are urged to sleep on the left side, for reasons mentioned above. Back sleeping can create back pain, breathing problems, and heartburn, lower blood pressure and reduce circulation. The fetal position keeps pressure off the liver.
Dreams
Right-side sleepers may have fewer nightmares. Disturbing dreams might be lessened by sleeping on the other side.
Back sleepers are also more likely to have nightmares and to recall less of their dreams.
Stomach sleepers have more vivid, intense, and sexual dreams. They’re also more likely to have dreams of being immobilized or restrained.
SLEEPING TOGETHER
Spooning is a fairly well known term. It’s where one partner snuggles up behind the other. It’s practiced by about 18% of couples and indicates a dynamic in which one partner takes a protective role with the other.
The Loose Spoon is exactly what it sounds like, the spoon but with less physical contact. It is typical of couples who start off spooning but relax as the relationship matures. It still says “I’ve got your back,” but is less sexual than spooning.
The Chase is like the spoon, except as the spoonee moves to the edge of the bed, the spooner follows. It might mean that the spoonee wants to be pursuedpursued OR that s/he wants more space. Clearly, these two motivations have quite different implications about the state of the relationship.
The Tangle is extremely intimate, the partners facing each other, arms and legs entwined. It is most common at the start of a romantic relationship, or in a situation of intense emotion. Couples that maintain the tangle throughout their relationship may be overly enmeshed, too dependent on each other.
The Unraveling Knot starts as a tangle that lasts about ten minutes, then the two people move apart. It’s a sign of a stronger relationship than the tangle, allowing for both intimacy and independence—the best of both worlds. Only 8% of couples exhibit this two-step style.
Liberty Lovers sleep back to back, not touching, indicating the people in the relationship are connected and secure, sharing both closeness and independence. It’s relatively popular, the preferred sleeping style for 27% of couples.
Back Kissers are like liberty lovers except their backs or bottoms touch. It’s more common among newer couples, those who have been together for less than a year.
The Nuzzle involves one partner resting his/her head on the other’s chest, legs often intertwined. It’s often seen in early relationships, sometimes rekindled ones. This is considered a nurturing position that creates a sense of protection and trust.
The Leg Hug is like playing footsie in bed—one partner’s leg over the other’s. It represents a craving for an emotional or sexual connection. They can’t get enough of each other, and their lives are so intertwined that they function as a pair—taking care of each other, finishing each other’s sentences, etc.
The Space Hog is when one partner takes the starfish position, indicating selfishness, especially when/if the sprawler pushes the other partner so s/he is hanging off the bed (or falls off). This often indicates a lack of honest conversation. It can demonstrate which partner is dominating the relationship. The person sleeping closest to the headboard tends to feel more dominant and confident, while the one who is farther from the headboard tend to be submissive and have lower self-esteem.
Bottom line for writers: Consider the sleep habits of your characters to make their private lives richer, add tension, and possibly demonstrate intimacy (or lack thereof).
Today’s blog entry was written by Kathleen Corcoran, a local harpist, teacher, writer, editor, favorite auntie, and very reluctant washer of dishes.
This is an update/response to a post originally written on June 9, 2017. I’ve decided to take up Vivian’s challenge and run with it as far as my over-active imagination can take me! (Spoiler warning: I can run pretty far.)
The program is simple. Take an ordinary event and consider all the ways you could add tension, conflict, humor, surprise, etc. For example, house-sitting.
This is definitely my brother’s house. Mine is right across the street!
My brother and sister-in-law live across the street from me. It’s a bit like having an extra WiFi connection, couch, kitchen, and bathroom, complete with pet-sitters and random free food. On this particular occasion, I was looking after my extended house while my brother’s family was out of town.
Mid-morning, I piled all my dirty dishes into a box and went across the street to take advantage of the dishwasher. And feed the fish. And water the plants.
What if
The box fell apart or dropped, smashing dirty dishes all over the street?
I forgot my key and had to jimmy open the window to climb in?
A neighbor called the police about the shifty-looking woman in slippers wandering around the yard with a suspiciously clattering box?
My niece is six-going-on-seven and makes her presence known even when she isn’t home. Little rainbow shoes and fluffy coats were left by the door. Exquisitely rendered crayon portraits covered the refrigerator. Scattered markers and Legos and hair ribbons and books and dinosaurs and a million other bits of her massive personality dominated every room in the house.
What if
I replaced all her artwork on the refrigerator with finger paintings by another niece, just to see if anyone would notice?
Paint, glue, juice boxes, etc. had spilled, making a big mess or possibly indicating that someone else had been in the house?
I stepped on a lego, screamed in pain, dropped the box of dishes on my other foot, stumbled back, tripped over a plastic sword-wielding dinosaur, knocked over a bookcase, crashed into the fish tank, and fell to the floor in an unconscious heap while fishy water and inevitable glitter dripped on my head?
When I go out of town, my brother takes care of my dog and turtle. When he’s out of town with his family, I feed his fish. I think I’m definitely getting the better end of the deal. All I have to do is shake a few pellets into the tank.
What if
The fish were floating upside down and I had to decide whether to dispose of the bodies and hope no one noticed or to save the bodies for a shoebox funeral when my niece returned
I knocked something in the tank and had to dive into the cold, salty water to save it, feeling fish and slimy water plants drift through my fingers?
A leak had developed in the tank overnight, leaving puddles on the floor and flopping fishy bodies on the gravel at the bottom of the tank?
If you find a pack of wolves in the living room, I suggest leaving them there and running away.
While the kitchen robot washed my dishes (I hate washing the dishes), I wandered around the house to check that everything looked as it should.
What if
Broken windows or missing/ disarranged valuables showed that someone had broken in?
An animal of some kind had gotten in through an overlooked air vent and clawed furniture, released bodily fluids, shed fur, knocked everything over, and then left? What if it was still there?
Embarrassing items of a personal nature had been left out?
A strange and not altogether pleasant smell was coming from somewhere?
The mail I brought in included an envelope marked “Past-Due” or “Cancer Test Results” or something else worrying?
I replaced all of the energy drinks in the kitchen with decaf drinks in similar cans?
So many possibilities! No matter how comfortable I am with my brother’s family, being in someone else’s home always feels just a bit voyeuristic. There are some things I can reliably assume I won’t find in my brother’s house, but a stranger’s house might contain anything a whole world of insanity!
Someone else in the house unexpectedly, maybe sleeping on the couch or looking through the refrigerator…?
The remnants of something illegal halfheartedly hidden in a trashcan…?
Poisonous plants to water very carefully without touching the leaves….?
A coffee table made from the taxidermied bodies of deceased pets…?
Burst pipes, smoking outlets, fires, or any other kind of disaster in progress…?
Sexually explicit photos framed and hung on the bathroom wall…?
A chandelier smashed on the floor with no clear reason why…?
Your assignment: Choose any mundane activity from today’s wealth—anything from doing laundry to going to the gym to hosting six for dinner—and take a few minutes to consider what if?
My oldest daughter was born bald as a billiard ball and stayed that way for more than three months. My cousin left the hospital with his black hair combed into an Elvis Presley pompadour, but after several weeks he began to lose it. Head hair goes through three stages: growth, resting, and shedding, in that order. At birth, babies’ hair is in the “resting” stage while bodily resources are devoted to more vital functions, like lung development and temperature regulation. After the resting phase, hair sheds. It goes into a growth phase again after three to seven months. From then till puberty, it’s a matter of gaining more head hair. Hair color and/or texture often goes through many changes in the first several month or years.
Bottom line for writers: Your young characters’ hair is pretty much up for grabs; except for the stage of “baby-fine,” hair tells us little about age or health of young children.
Puberty
Males start growing body hair: face, underarms, chest, arms and legs, public area. This can be any time between 9 and 14.
Females grow hair in adult female patterns: underarms, legs, genital area. Usually starts between 8 and 13.
Following puberty, hair growth patterns are fairly steady for the next couple of decades.
Bottom line for writers: Hair can be used in a number of ways, but between puberty and 30 or so it isn’t an age marker.
Hair Sculptor Laetitia Ky from Ivory Coast .
Adults shed hair regularly, perhaps 80-100 hairs a day. Shedding hair is not the same as thinning hair or going bald. Babies are born with all the hair follicles they will ever have. When hair follicles shut down, thinning hair or baldness result. And why would writers care?
Why Hair Follicles Shut Down
Age: Both males and females typically notice some thinning or loss of scalp hair as they age, usually starting in the 50s and progressing in 60s, 70s, and 80s.
A good way to show rather than tell that a character is a “mature” adult
Genetics: Both thinning and pattern badness tend to run in families for both females and males.
An unacknowledged family connection could be inferred by similar patterns and ages of onset
Alopecia: An autoimmune condition that attacks hair follicles leading to hair loss on the scalp as well as other parts of the body. Symptoms usually start in childhood.
Good for adding stress and tension.
Side effects of medication/treatment: Think chemotherapy, but also vitamin deficiencies, some antibiotic, some antidepressants (4 to 6 months after starting treatment), some anticonvulsants for epileptics (dose dependent). Hair usually regrows when/if the treatment ends.
A clue to unacknowledged/undiagnosed medical issues
Maybe someone introducing unneeded treatment in order to produce the side effects of hair loss/thinning
Hormonal changes: For women, pregnancy and/or menopause; high cortisol levels and thyroid imbalance for both women and men, insulin resistance and estrogen dominance. Deficiencies in vitamin B12, biotin, and zinc can worsen hormone based hair loss.
Maybe the hair changes/losses create emotional stress during pregnancy or menopause
Maybe a character is so upset that a major life goal is to find a “cure” through hormone and/or nutritional therapy
A good hairstylist may notice an illness or pregnancy before the patient simply by observing changing hair
Certain hairstyles: High ponytails, cornrows, braids, and pigtails if they are too tight and these styles are worn too long.
Consider a character whose self-concept and/or identity is connected to hairstyle and appearance
How Hair Changes Over Time
Growth: Scalp hair grows an average of half an inch a month. And a single hair can last up to six years. Consider hair length as an indicator of age.
Color: Chances are, when you think of an old person’s hair, you first think gray. Graying hair can be brought on or accelerated by stress, and unhealthy diet, lack of sleep, or serious illness.
Generally, the lighter your skin, the sooner your hair will turn gray. Caucasians usually start to turn gray in their early 30s, those with darker skin generally start to go gray in their 40s.
Hair often grays first at the temples; sometimes it’s throughout the head hair.
Body hair usually turns gray later, but sometimes not at all.
When eyebrows gray, the individual brow hairs are long and coarse.
Is your character embracing gray, or fighting it every step of the way?
What is your character willing to do to hide gray hair?
And N.B.: there are far more than 50 shades of gray. Be precise when you describe your character. Think silver, iron, lead, clouds, snow—or that old standby, salt-and-pepper.
Thickness and texture: Over time, hair becomes rougher and more prone to break, and each hair itself becomes thinner and smaller. Give more depth to your descriptions of old hair, perhaps through touch.
Thinning hair and baldness by sex:
By age 60, two-thirds of males exhibit male-pattern baldness. Hair loss occurs first on the top or at the temples.
Female-pattern baldness is typically exhibited as thin hair and visible scalp.
Consider a man who shaves his entire head rather than exhibit graying hair and balding.
What might a woman with thinning hair experience? Feel? Do?
Some women can create rather impressive facial hair. .
Facial and body hair: In general, facial and body hair also change with greater age. Women and men have less hair on arms, legs, underarms, chest, stomach, and in the genital area
Women’s remaining hair may get courser, usually around the lips and on the chin.
Men are likely to grow ear and nose hair.
Both men and women are likely to lose hair on the outer third of the eyebrows and to get long, coarse eyebrow hairs.
Older women may grow too much hair, hirsutism, showing hair in places usually associated with male bodies (face, neck, chest, thighs, back).
Using Hair To Distinguish Your Character
Face it, many people spend time on hair in one way or another. Except for haircuts, and maybe hair color, these are activities that tend to happen in private if not in secret. What your character does, how, and how often gives your reader a private, intimate view of your character.
Women
Changing hair color, either DYI or at a salon
Removing hair
Underarm, leg, eyebrow, face, genital area, around nipples
Via tweezing, depilatory, waxing, or shaving
Men
Changing hair color (scalp or facial)
Shaving
How often?
Using what instrument?
Beard?
What length?
Remove, trim, or shape body hair
Aging Athletes
Those who removed all hair to improve performance: swimmers, cyclists, runners, etc. Do they continue their old habits?
Female athletes who train intensely throughout puberty often stop mentstruating temporarily, which can have a long-term effect on hair growth, texture, and color.
Hair Politics
Hair is so closely connected to personal identity and image that controversy is more or less inevitable. For more specifics on these issues, I advise you to visit the resources linked.
Religious direction at odds with uniform or dress standards
Royal Canadian Mounted Police recently changed their facial hair requirements, allowing Sikhs, Muslims, and members of other religions to serve as officers.
(Unrelated but still really cool – the Air Force has also started making uniform shirts that allow women to breastfeed while in uniform!)
British Royal Navy uniform regulations now allow Rastafarians to maintain their long hair and beards so long as safety (such as face mask seals) is not compromised. Uniform regulations may be adjusted further to allow turbans.
Many private religious schools in the US require specific hair lengths for boys and girls; boys cannot have long hair, and girls cannot have short hair.
Similarly, many schools have specific regulations forbidding cornrows, dreadlocks, box braids, and other hairstyles primarily worn by students of African descent.
Opposing cultural pressures on women (and men) to change the length, color, texture, or style of their hair
Society defines the ideal of beautiful hair ideal is silky smooth, blond or brunette, and as soft and fine as a baby’s – in essence, Caucasian.
Many of the products used to achieve these results are extremely caustic if not toxic.
Women who relax, color, heat, and style their hair to meet this ideal sometimes face push-back from within their own communities.
Military regulations, school dress codes, athletic associations, etc. often prohibit hair styles favored by women of African descent as well as “natural” hair styles; effectively, this forces women to cut their hair very short or use extreme treatments to mimic Caucasian hair. It is still legal in the United States to fire or refuse to hire an employee who has deadlocks, even if they are not a safety concern.
Both men and women are pushed to remove all traces of gray from their hair, along with masking crows feet, laugh lines, age spots, and so on from skin.
Historically (and currently, in some parts of the world), women have been punished for various transgressions by having their hair cut very short.
Hair texture and color has been used as a marker on the scale of race differentiation in apartheid South Africa, by Adolph Hitler to determine Jewish ancestry, discriminating against “Catholic” redheads during the Great Famine in Ireland, while separating Aboriginal families in Australia, and in many other periods of history.
Czar Peter the Great of Russia decided that long beards were old-fashioned and not Western enough and forbade them in his court, going so far as forcibly cutting off the beards of his courtiers.
The dubious world of hair extensions
Hair extensions are primarily marketed to women trying to achieve the ideal set by society and hair product companies.
The hair to make the extensions is often sourced from women in dire situations.
Venezualan women have created a black market selling their hair and breast milk, which is the only way many of them can afford food.
Rural Indian women, whose long hair is often a traditional class or culture marker, have their hair forcibly shaved off by men in their families desperate for income.
Khmer women sometimes have their extremely long hair cut off by police as punishment for dubious charges or by family members desperate for food.
Northern Russian women with blond hair are particularly prized by buyers because of the versatility of naturally light hair. Several buyers make routine circuits through isolated areas and pressure women (and young girls) to sell their hair repeatedly, paying only a few dollars for hair they sell for hundreds of dollars.
Miscellaneous Hair Facts That May or May Not Be Useful to Writers
Regardless of location on the body, hair goes through the stages of growing, resting, and shedding.
Trimming does not affect the growth cycle of hair.
Head hair can continue to grow for 3-7 years for each follicle, at the rate of 6 inches per month.
Chest hair doesn’t grow beyond a certain length, often about 1 inch.
Armpit hair can be longer than chest hair and may grow outside the bounds of the armpit.
Pubic hair is often trimmed, shaped, or completely removed.
Eyebrow hairs stop at about 1 centimeter until they go rogue during older age, sometimes reaching an inch or more untrimmed.
Bottom bottom line for writers: Use hair more in your characterizations and plots. It is less common and will make your work fresher.
Skin is the largest sense organ in the human body—and it is the most developed sensory function in infants. Matthew Hertenstein is a big name in touch research, and he has characterized touch communications in three categories:
Universal
Anger, fear, disgust, love, gratitude, and sympathy
Prosocial
Surprise, happiness, and sadness
Self-focused
Embarrassment envy, and pride
Numerous researchers have attempted to define how much information is communicated between humans through touch alone. In a practical sense, touch is seldom communicated without other verbal or nonverbal cues, so Hertenstein developed a series of controlled experiments. Pairs of participants were placed in a very artificial situation: the two sat on opposite sides of a curtain. The encoder would try to express a specific emotion by touching the decoder’s forearm with no visual or verbal cues; the decoder would then select the emotion received.
Bottom line: Human beings are surprisingly successful at this! Romantic partners were more successful than strangers.
Romantic partners were accurate:
53% of universal emotions
60% of prosocial emotions
39% of self-focused emotions
Strangers were accurate:
39% of universal emotions
56% of prosocial emotions
17% of self-focused emotions
But there is more than one way to group emotions.Klare Heston (LCSW) discusses ways to convey specific positive emotions in real-life situations. Writers can expand these narrow groupings to fit a wide variety of situations and communication needs.
Using Touch to Convey Positive Emotions
(Always determine whether it is appropriate to touch the other person.)
Offer congratulations and praise with a pat.
Show love with hugs and kisses.
Flirt with a person.
Welcome a person warmly according to cultural norms (rub noses, etc.).
Say thank you.
Convey sympathy.
Expressing other Emotions with Touch
Gain a person’s attention.
Let a person know you’re in charge.
Reveal surprise.
Disclose fear.
Indicate anger.
Bottom line for writers here: As evident in the previously cited research, any given act—e.g., touching the forearm—can support, emphasize, or outright convey many emotions.
Touch is strongly dependent on culture and context. Do you want your reader to be clear on the meaning of a touch or keep them guessing?
Touch is absolutely necessary for normal child development, especially the ability of children to handle stress. The touch bond between mother and fetus begins in the womb. Human babies struggle to survive without a sense of touch, even if they retain sight and hearing.
Research indicates that for adults, touch can change the way bodies function, e.g., lower blood pressure and heart rate. Depression and eating disorders have been linked to touch deprivation in adults, and it is more common for men than women because of the stronger social prohibitions against same-sex touch for adult males.
This article cites five areas of touch in typical nonverbal communication:
Functional/ Professional
Besides doctors and others whose work requires touching, touching in the workplace can have both positive and negative effects. Everyone knows the “power handshake,” that those who are dominant shake harder and longer. Bone crushing is generally considered to be bad. Also, superiors feel freer to touch subordinates than vice versa, whether pats on the back or touches on the forearm. Touching stresses how important a message is and the dominance of the toucher.
Social/Polite.
Different areas of the body are appropriate to touch in different social situations. Women are freer being touched by a member of the same sex. Men are more comfortable being touched by a female stranger than women are with being touched by a male stranger. Holding a handshakes longer than two seconds will result stop the verbal communication.
Friendship/Warmth.
Women are more likely to express friendship or warmth through a hug; men shake hands. Within families, women are more likely to touch; but also same sex family members are more likely to touch than opposite sex family members.
Love/Intimacy.
Men are more likely to make the initial moves on intimate touches. Holding hands or an arm across the shoulder is a territorial marker. Touch is more important to women than to men.
Touching between married couples seems to help maintain good health. University of Virginia psychologist Jim Coan found that women under stress were immediately relieved by merely holding their husbands’ hands.
Violence in intimate relationships falls into two categories:
Intimate terrorism involves a need to control or dominate, escalates over time in terms of frequency and severity.
“Common couple violence” comes in episodes and doesn’t escalate over time.
Sexual/Arousal.
First touch often involves a neutral body part and seems “accidental.”
Hugging. Intention to touch, e.g., extending a hand across a table.
Kissing. The final case, love-making, may include kissing, nuzzling, gentle massage, and other foreplay.
Alternatively, wikipedia.org lists seven categories of touch meanings.
Can be affection or aggression, tend to lighten the interaction
Control
Compliance, attention-getting, encouraging a response
Ritualistic
Mostly greetings and departures, but also includes the chest bumps, etc., shared among athletes (related to wins) and the ritual handshakes at games end
Hybrid
Greeting/affection; departure/affection
Couldn’t the hybrid be negative?
Task-related
Everything from hairdressers to dance/ yoga instructors to emergency responders
Accidental
Consist mostly of brushes, but results in better tips for wait staff, fosters cooperation, and even makes people feel better about libraries (!)
the1thing.com points out that the U.S. is a low-touch culture. They go on to suggest five ways people can communicate more effectively by using touch.
Accompany praise with a pat on the back
Build cooperative relations by starting discussions with touch
Make business handshakes more effective by extending it for a beat
Give and get massages to strengthen and deepen bonds
Consider location when you touch (i.e., private or public)
Depending on situation, touch can be perceived as threatening or creepy, especially if it’s prolonged. To be safe, keep touch brief and keep to the arm, shoulder, hand.
The most important things we reveal through touch are degree of dominance and degree of intimacy.
Bottom line for writers: We often touch with little or no planning, and perceive the communication of touch without conscious thought. Given context, your reader will know the meaning of a touch. And consider that touch is often the fastest means of communication. A touch can communicate stop, fear, affection, etc.
When I was a kid, we had to read our books barefoot in the snow!
Today’s blog entry was written by Kathleen Corcoran, a local harpist, teacher, writer, editor, favorite auntie, and collector of really bad jokes.
Every night, I cry myself to sleep over the thought that I will never be able to read all the books I want to read. My time is precious and must be saved for important activities like confusing my turtle with shadow puppets and giving my nieces caffeine and loud toys. That’s where reader reviews and reader recommendations come in handy.
Reviews are also helpful for a completely different purpose: they can provide a writer with (pretend) feedback before the writing is actually finished! As an added bonus, the best reviews can provide a solid abdominal muscle workout by causing insane fits of laughter, generally in the most inopportune public places.
Provided here for your entertainment and education are some of my favorite reviews and the writing lessons they illustrate. Reviews are gathered from Audible.com, Barnes and Noble, Amazon books, Goodreads, and a few book review blogs. The names of reviewers and the books being reviewed are provided where applicable.
Avoid Repetition by Editing or Having a Good Editor to Cut Out Repetition
She repeats herself to accentuate her point like she’s me writing like I talk when I’m wasted, which I’m fairly sure she’s not. She says things like (and I’m paraphrasing here) “I couldn’t have testified in Ted’s defense. That was just something I could not do.” Really? Could you do it, Ann? Could you?!? Wait, I’m confused…so you’re saying you could do it or you couldn’t do it? You see what I mean.
“I can hardly contain the riotous feelings or is it hormones that rampage through my body.” – Yes, this supposedly went through an editor. I don’t think it’s ever been specified whether or not said editor was literate and/or an alcoholic and/or addicted to painkillers.
WORDS WORDS WORDS IS THE HOUSE HAUNTED WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS IS SHE CRAZY WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS ARE THEY ALL CRAZY WORDS WORDS WORDS NO IT MUST BE HAUNTED WORDS WORDS WORDS NO SHE MUST BE CRAZY WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS WORDS CRAZY WORDS SICKNESS WORDS WORDS WORDS DEATH THE END.
“Mr Unconvincingname, it’s renowned author Dan Brown,” told the voice at the other end of the line. Instantly the voice at the other end of the line was replaced by a different voice at the other end of the line. “Hello, it’s literary agent John Unconvincingname,” informed the new voice at the other end of the line. “Hello agent John, it’s client Dan,” commented the pecunious scribbler.
I was beaten over the head over and over and over again with Ana’s self-doubt and insecurities. I can honestly say that I had no idea this kind of feeling was even possible. I’ve never had a book so thoroughly turn off my desire to read before. Ever.
Very early in Inferno, I realized that Dan Brown’s career-long fetish for ellipses had reached a whole new level. Basically, ellipses are the hero of the book. … … …
Characters are Actually Important
Parts of the book were discussing political views nothing to do with Anna. It appeared their (sic) were many main characters not only Anna. [a review of Anna Karenina]
Um, I don’t remember the flying scene in Anna Karenina…
Any time an author tries to sell me on a character’s “charm” by waxing hormonal about how “ridiculously good-looking” he is, I snicker inwardly. I can’t think why….
If you can relate to anyone in this novel, then I dismiss you as inherently bad. In fact, I f***ing hate you. Yes, you.
Harpo Marx is proof that all musicians (at least harpists) are inherently good people.
Seriously, all she thinks about (and she is the primary narrator) is Zeb. Zeb, Zeb, Zebby Debby Doo. Zibbity Dibbity Dib Doodle Doo, I wuv you.
[W]e know Christian’s super deep and sophisticated because he plays the piano and listens to obscure classical music. This is how we know Edward Christian is really just a lost soul in need of love; his love of music. Everyone knows that no one threatening listens to music. Music lovers just aren’t capable of doing anything bad.
Oh, the narrator, you ask? Yeah, he’s an a**hole, too. Don’t seek comfort there, because he’s basically nothing more than a lie factory wallpapered in tweed.
Know Your Audience, and Know That Not Everyone will be Your Audience
The reviewer on the right is clearly not a fan.
I had made reservation and on the date I was to go I had a very bad cold and fever and I called them to change my reservation and they refused. [a very confused review of “Haunted: Ten Tales of Ghosts“]
Not so hot; phony intellectuals are told this is a great work so they make up all sorts of lies about layering and craftsmanship, when it’s really just a so-so story and the ending with the guy Marlon Brandon played in the movie (Apocalypse Now) going crazy and Conrad never explaining why there should be such a fascination with him. It might be a nice book if there was a story here. But these modern phonies do not understand that writing is supposed to be enjoyable. [a review of Heart of Darkness]
Sure, I could certainly compose a lengthy list of love-or-hate writers I’ve witnessed throughout my stint on this website, but Murakami is one of the dudes who seems to catch oddly equal amount of rapturous praise and sneering vitriol. When one considers reading his work and attempts to decide whether or not to invest the time based solely on the thoughts others have shared here on this website, it must make the head do some Exorcist-spins. [on author Haruki Murakami]
I think there was way to much sexual content, and the story line was incredibly sad. Certainly not something i would recommend for anyone under the age of fifteen, If you want to get an idea of what the book is about, just search the title in the Wikipedia. no Students don’t need to read this filth. [a review of Tess of the d’Urbervilles]
So I went into reading this with a huge wall up (I know, I know, a terrible way to read), but then I realized that I wasn’t JUST going to be proselytized to… I was going to be threatened with nasty, rotting, coldsore-herpee-mange-pits all over my body that George W. Bush and Paris Hilton are going to take turns pouring their boiling-hot-diarrhea-snot into. Dante, you sick bastard! AWESOME!!! [a review of Dante’s Inferno]
This story needs editing. [Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier]
A special note to those who say my review stopped them from reading this book: No no no! Read it! I actually reread the whole series last summer and enjoyed it immensely. Just read it for what it is: ludicrous, well-written, humorous, delicious TRASH. Just don’t expect it to be the most brilliant novel ever written and you’ll be fine.
Causing Genuine Emotional Response Can Make Up For Almost Everything
There is no fluffy stuffing here, just good, straight storytelling with the added bonus of cautiously crafted prose. Also, it’s really f***ing creepy, and me being creeped out by anything at this point in my life is a pretty tall order. I mean, aside from spiders and needles and being buried alive and over-sexualized pre-teen Lolita-types who collect and dress like that Bratz line of toy dolls. Now that sh*t is creepy.
Lookie here, folks, this is me giving a 4-star rating to a massively sexist, pro-Christian, anti-sex, anti-birth-control novella about a guy who murders his wife for maybe cheating on him, feels justified in doing so, and gets away with it!
Scenes from this book will return when you are stuck in traffic, and you will cry some more. Do not operate a motor vehicle under the influence of this book.
This book is a ball-crusher, and not for the faint of heart. I mean, no matter how you spin it, it is BLEAK. Don’t read it while experimenting with different anti-depression medications or anything. You’ve been warned.
There’s a rare and surprisingly invigorating clarity that comes along with that drowning feeling, one that is more worthwhile than protection from what frightens you… and Flannery’s world is a frightening place. Do with that what you will, and make your choice whether or not you are willing to get emotionally smacked around a bit with words.
Even Fiction Needs Some Reality
Totally unrealistic: her nails are way too clean!
I admit that I’ve never personally been stalked by two psychopathic, cannibal rapists with crazy futuristic guns in a lawless post-apocalyptic warzone, but I don’t think I would be cracking dick jokes and worrying about petty jealousies if I were. Well, maybe the dick jokes, but not all the time!
Actually, that is a two year old reading Japanese.
After spending basically half a lifetime dipped in chocolately booze pools with naked bodies slithering all around him while he passed the glass n’ rolled up dollar bill around, our protagonist sits by a river for, I dunno, a couple of minutes reciting “Om” before it just miraculously all comes back to him and he’s all enlightened and at peace again and sh*t.
“Oh Satan’s navel!” she said. “Now I remember!” Yeeeeeaeh, this is how real people talk.
The closest thing to un-evil that a lady can do for herself that is sex-related is have children within the bounds of marriage (this is their sole reason for existing anyways, right? AMIRIGHTFELLAS?!), then move on to raise them. Anything else is double, double toil and trouble.
Are You Sure Those Are the Words You Want? All of Them?
My eyes were so glazed over from reading page after page detailing every color and stitch and ornament on the heroine’s ball gown that I totally missed the one sentence when Evil Dude snuck in and stabbed her.
Renowned author Dan Brown gazed admiringly at the pulchritudinous brunette’s blonde tresses, flowing from her head like a stream but made from hair instead of water and without any fish in.
Don’t get me wrong, if well-written, this storyline could be very interesting. But even after just ten pages, the only thought going through my mind was “When will this guy shut up and tell the story???” The plot comes in a distant second to the narrator’s monotone, seemingly unending monologue. If I could withstand this, I believe I would have enjoyed it. But forgive me for not having that kind of patience for hundreds of pages. [a review of 1984]
“If you will not read books, you will forget the grammar.”
“Atop a control tower in the distance, the Turkish flag fluttered proudly – a field of red emblazoned with the ancient symbol of the crescent and star – vestiges of the Ottoman Empire, still flying proudly in the modern world.” C’mon, Dan Brown! Make an effort, bro!
Cutters, Lolitas, Munchausen by Proxy, obsessions, family hatreds, drug abuse, scandalous sex, graphic violence, serial murder, wealth, poverty, popularity, bullying, hypochondria, crippling jealousy, police procedural bullshit, alcoholism, taboo masturbation fantasies, eating disorders, small town smothering, big city anonymity, career/life/love failures, falls from grace, the hell of being romantically idealized by someone and then seen in vivid, horrible detail for what you really are: all addressed in this slim little novel. It’s pretty f***ing good, to be honest. Just…don’t loan it to your mother. And hope that no one in this novel reminds you of your mother.
Writing Ridiculous Reviews Online Could Even Be a Way to Hone Your Craft
A Million Random Digits with 100,000 Normal Deviates
I had a hard time getting into this book. The profanity was jarring and stilted, not at all how people really talk. Frankly, the book came off as strictly workshop material. But after about 50 pages, I found myself immersed in the style. What had been stilted became lyrical and engaging. Authors go entire lifetimes without matching the poetry of couplets such as those of Mr. Rand Corporation. I can only wish I had thought of 41145 42820. [a review of A Million Random Digits with 100,000 Normal Deviates]
If You Give a Mouse a Cookie is the story of the perversity of desire, and more particularly the stunted pleasures of the bourgeoisie. Written by the exquisite Laura Numeroff, in what can only be assumed was a violent passion for sterile aloofness from the society which she condemned, and a lust for concision which would socialize her treatise against the deadening wants, making it accessible to the masses. I can imagine her, unbathed, ignorant of her own hunger and thirst, cutting every insignificant word in a Flaubertian frenzy for le mot juste. ……”
There were no significant plot twists, and none of the characters developed enough for me to really “care” what happened next. If you’re looking for a challenging yet entertaining way to spend 4 hours reading, this is for you, but if you are seeking more thrills and suspense, consider a Steven (sic) King novel. [a review of Where is Baby’s Belly Button?]
It’s everywhere! And surely anything as ubiquitous as salt has a place in your writing. The English language is sprinkled liberally with salt. The following phrases are so common that they are clichés, and writers note: as such these may have a place in dialogue but seldom, if at all, in narrative. No doubt most if not all of these are familiar, so take this as a nudge to use them.
Basamaci Restaurant in Shiraz is made entirely of salt.
Wieliczka-Zwiedzanie Salt Mine in Krakow, Poland
Rub salt into the wound: make a painful experience worse
Salt a mine: bring in ore or something else to make the source seem rich
Salt the books: inflate receipts to falsely show more money
Salt of the earth: a really good person
Salting the earth: victors sowed salt to prevent the growth of plants on enemy land
Worth one’s salt (or not): has earned his money (or not)
Take something with a pinch/grain of salt: view skeptically, think something is exaggerated
Salt away: save for the future
Old salt: old seaman
Above/below the salt: above is closer to the seat of power, indicating the diners’ relative status
Salt mine: figuratively, work, especially a difficult job or task
Salty language: somewhat rude or shocking
Writers: Consider building a scene or a plot around one of these
Salt Mines in India
Salt in Religion
As valuable as salt has been, finding it used in religious ceremonies is only to be expected.
Different types of salt can make a rainbow of flames
In Hittite rituals, during Semite and Greek festivals at the time of the new moon, salt was thrown into fire where it popped and crackled.
Egyptians, Greeks, and Romans made offerings of salt and water to their gods.
Some historians think this may have been the origin of Holy Water in Christian rituals.
In Aztec tradition, the fertility goddess (Huixtocihuatl) presided over salt and salt water.
Hindus consider salt auspicious and use it in weddings and house-warmings.
Devotees of Jainism lay an offering of raw rice with a bit of salt before a deity to symbolize devotion.
Salt is sprinkled on cremains before they are buried.
Mahayana Buddhists use salt to ward off evil spirits.
After a funeral, a pinch of salt is thrown over the left shoulder to prevent evil spirits from entering the house, a practice that is also copied by superstitious people of many cultures.
Shinto Priestess
In Shinto Buddhism, salt is used for ritual purification (people and places).
Small piles of salt are placed at the entrances of shrines to ward off evil and attract patron spirits.
In Judaism, salted bread is recommended for passing around the table after the Kiddush.
Sabbath bread is dipped in salt, as are the bitter herbs at Passover.
Both Jewish and Muslim dietary laws require removing blood from freshly slaughtered meat; salt and brine are used for the purpose.
In Wicca, salt is symbolic of the element Earth; it cleanses harmful or negative energy. A dish of salt and one of water are nearly always present on an altar, and salt is used in many rituals and ceremonies.
What if a character not of a particular culture or religion learned something about the rituals and decided to practice them?
Catedral del Sal, Colombia
When most people think “salt” they think of seasoning food. In fact, only 6% of salt is consumed by people. Even so, gourmets identify at least 12 salts used in food preparation. Also, salty is one of the five basic tastes (along with sweet, bitter, sour, and umami). In addition, salt releases food molecules into the air, giving food an aroma. And FYI, apart from the basic tastes, almost all other tastes are actually smell. In small amounts, salt curbs bitterness and enhances sweet, sour, and umami. In higher amounts, it reduces sweetness and enhances umami, great for savor and meat dishes.
Table salt: most common, from underground deposits, highly refined and finely ground, usually treated with an anti-caking age. Often iodine is added to prevent goiter.
Kosher salt: flakier and coarser grained than table salt, good for sprinkling on food and cooking. Does not have additives. Not kosher itself, it’s used in the koshering process
Sea salt: from evaporated sea water, usually unrefined and coarser grained than table salt. Contains minerals (e.g., zinc, potassium, iron) and flavor from where harvested.
Himalayan pink salt: purest salt in the world. It contains the 84 elements found in the human body.
Celtic sea salt (gray salt): harvest off the coast of France, mineral rich, chunky grains.
Fluer de sel (flower of salt):delicate, paper-thin crystals, harvested by hand with wooden rakes, the most expensive of all food salts
Kala namak (black salt): it’s Himalayan, with a faint sulfur aroma that goes tofu (for example) the taste of eggs
Flake salt: harvested by boiling sea water, thin irregular crystals, very low mineral content
Black and red Hawaiian salt: both coarse-grained and crunchy, great with seafood and meat.
Smoked salt: slow smoked up to two weeks over a wood fire (e.g., hickory, mesquite, apple, oak, alder); varies in flavor
Pickling salt: used for pickling and brining, no added iodine or anti-caking agents, not many base minerals
Consider a character who has 5 or 6 types of salt on hand: which kinds and why?
Salt Mine in Belarus
Myriad Uses for Salt
In researching this topic, I read that there are more than 14,000 uses for salt. Searching online for uses for salt turns up lists of all sorts of lengths—6, 12, 20, 55—more than enough to establish salt’s place in the life of your character. Is your character thrifty, and thus finds salt a less expensive alternative to cleaning, medical, or beauty products? Does your character strive for simplicity, and want to purge as many products as possible? Here are a few examples. Each bigger topic could be researched separately.
Around the home
Keep wicker looking new
Put out a fire
Deodorize shoes
Prevent new towels from fading in the wash
Health and beauty
Alternative to mouthwash
Exfoliate your skin
Dandruff treatment
Gargle saltwater for sore throat
Cleaning with salt
Remove tea and coffee stains from mugs and carafes
Clean a dirty room
Refresh chopping boards
Get rid of watermarks on wood furniture
Pickled Lemons
Salt in the kitchen
Quick and easy nut shelling
Test the freshness of an egg
Extend the life of cheese
Whip egg whites and heavy quicker
Keep sliced apples and potatoes from browning
Salt outside
Keep car windshield frost-free in winter
Pain relief from a bee sting
Keep stains from setting in clothing
Salt Flats in Bolivia
Importance of Salt—Past and Present
Or you could go to a salt cave in Minneapolis and sit
It is essential for human and other animal life.
At the same time, excessive salt consumption is related to high blood pressure and other cardiovascular diseases.
Salting food is one of the oldest methods of preservation, along with drying and smoking, dating to at least 6050 BCE in Bulgaria, 5400 BCE in Romania, and 6000 BCE in China. It’s still used as a preservative in processed foods.
Other uses include water conditioning (12%)
De-icing highways (8%)
68% of world-wide salt production is used for manufacturing and industrial processing (PVC, plastics, paper pulp, aluminum, soaps, glycerine, synthetic rubber, and firing pottery, drilling, to fix color in dying textiles, tanning hides)
Salt was used for barter pretty much world-wide:
Moorish merchants in the 6th century traded salt for gold, weight for weight.
Salt was traded like gold or silk everywhere along the Silk Road and throughout Europe.
Salt has been used as money in Ethiopia, other parts of Africa, and Tibet.
An allowance of salt was made to officers and soldiers in the Roman Army.
The Road (2009) from the novel by Cormac McCarthy
Writers: Consider an apocalyptic story in which the basic necessity of salt returns.
The Lasting Stamp of Salt
In many places, in many forms, the historical significance of salt continues to reverberate today.
サラリーマン !
Naming rights:
One of the oldest roads in Italy is Via Salaria, salt route
The river Salzach in Austria translates to salt river
Salzburg means salt castle
The Roman allowance of salt turned into a monetary allowance to buy salt, and this salarium gave rise to the English word salary
In Japan, a person who works a M-F office job is often referred to as a salaryman (サラリーマン )
Gandhi led people on a march to the sea to distill salt after British salt laws were imposed.
Salting the Dead—and Not Dead
Somehow, I don’t think salt water is going to help alleviate torture…
Salt accelerates the process of decomposition of the body.
It helps to prevent bad odor from leaking out of the soil where the corpse is buried, so dogs and other predators don’t dig up the body.
If someone is buried in salt up to his/her neck: the salt would start to draw water out of the body slowly. The skin starts wrinkling and drying as time goes by, mouth becomes parched and eyes become irritated because of the loss of moisture. It becomes harder to breathe as water leaves the body and the blood becomes thicker and more coagulated. The terrible thing is that unlike being buried alive, the person would likely remain conscious and eventually delirious before dying a long time later. The corpse would be dehydrated and preserved by the salt and thus become a mummy.
Writers: consider the dark possibilities of torture and/or murder.
Cristal Samana Salt Hotel in Uyumi, Bolivia
Bottom line for writers: sprinkled throughout!
No discussion of salt is complete without mentioning legendary musicians Salt N Pepa!
Yep. I’m into body parts. I’ve blogged about feet, hands, handedness, hair, etc. Today, it’s eyes. Eyes stare, wink, and roll, among other things. For many people, eyes are the first thing they notice. They communicate all the time. But what are they saying? I’m talking about the U.S. But be aware that the meaning of eye contact varies between societies, with religious and social differences.
I think these eyes are saying, “I’m going to steal this firetruck!”
Those Lying Eyes
It’s a truism that a liar can’t look you in the eye, that people look away when lying or trying to deceive. What does the research say?
Introverts struggle to maintain eye contact when lying
Extrovert liars tend to engage in more eye contact as a way of asserting innocence
In many cultures, eye aversion is a sign of respect for the speaker
We look away when we are comfortable
We look away when we retrieve facts from our memory
We look away when we contemplate the future
We look down, move our eyes side to side, hold still, or even close our eyes as we process information
People with autistic disorders or social anxieties find eye contact particularly unsettling
Those Truthful Eyes
Squinting or narrowing the eyes indicates discomfort, stress, or anger, i.e., nothing good
When nervous or troubled, blink rate increases five times or more over the base rate
People make more eye contact with people or things they like, indicating attraction, attentiveness, interest
People look away from things/people found distasteful
Eyes can convey six basic emotions: sadness, disgust, anger, joy, fear, and surprise
Direction of gaze indicates where one’s attention lies
Eye contact is an important element of flirting
In many crowded cities (New York, London), strangers in close proximity avoid eye contact to help maintain privacy
Consider Problem Eyes
Although looking at a speaker indicates respect and/or shows you are listening, too much of a good thing might signal an effort to assert dominance.
A condition like chronic dry eye, which is accompanied by redness, watering eyes, rubbing itchy or burning eyes send negative messages, such as lack of interest, fatigue, disagreement, or disbelief.
FYI: Studies suggest that eye contact has a positive impact on the retention and recall of information—i.e., it facilitates learning.
Colorful Considerations
Eye color is genetic. Blue, green, and grey eyes are a result of recessive genes.
There is some evidence that the color of a person’s irises has some effect on personality or physical health. Though the science on that is still a bit nebulous, multiple studies have shown that eye color affects the way a person is perceived. Of course, every person is different and perceptions vary among cultures, there are some stereotypes that are more common than others.
Brown eyes
Compassionate
Humble
Warm and friendly
Outgoing, vivacious, extroverted
Fabulous kissers, fabulous lovers
Energetic
Willing to take risks
Blue eyes
Insincere, untrustworthy
Self-absorbed
Intelligent
Excelling at strategy, academic sciences (left-brained!)
Studies have shown that men with blue eyes are more likely to choose romantic partners who also have blue eyes. Men with other eye colors did not demonstrate any consistent preference.
Babies are born with blue eyes, which usually darken to other colors as melanin in the iris increases.
Hazel eyes
Determined, strong in the face of adversity
Imaginative and creative
Fall in love quickly and intensely
Self-centered
Green eyes
Self-sufficient
Confident
Emotionally restrained
Love fun and laughing
Initially reserved but ultimately quite talkative
Grey eyes
Conformist
Quiet
Sensitive, empathic
Mystical and wise
Deceptive
Bottom line for writers: Eyes are a powerful tool, but to be clear, eyes have to be interpreted in context.
Don’t discount the appeal of puppy eyes!And then there are those times when no eyes can be seen…
The first thought to come to mind is probably American Sign Language. Important as it is, that isn’t a big part of this blog, primarily because I know next to nothing about it. For information from experts in Sign Language and Deaf culture, check out these other sources:
Instead, I am going to take a look at the hand language that people pick up without really thinking about it. In spite of humans developing amazing verbal language, we still engage our hands to enhance communication of our emotions, thoughts, and meaning. Think of how hands are used by effective speakers (e.g., Hitler), magicians, and orchestra conductors, for example.
Talking Hands are a Gift for Writers!
Use hands to show rather than tell how a person is feeling, whether anxious, scared, frustrated, or confident. Mismatching words and hand movements are invaluable for indicating dishonesty, lies, or at the least a situation undermining trust.
Hand slang is culture-bound. By hand slang, I mean gestures that convey a specific meaning in a particular culture. For example, in the United States, the following gestures are generally understood:
Rubbing palms together: anticipation, positive expectation; rubbing faster is more positive
Tubbing thumb against index finger or fingers: financial gain, expectation
Fist pump: victory, win
Fist bump: congratulations, casual greeting
Closed fist, middle finger extended: f*ck you, up yours
Closed fist, index and middle fingers extended: peace, accent for photos
Thumb to nose, fingers waggling: mocking, distain
Thumbs to ears, tongue sticking out: a childish gesture of disdain or insult
Hand over heart: sincerity, believe me
Right hand raised, elbow bent: believe me, I swear; stop
Clenched fist: anger, irritation, or tension
Crooking the index finger: come here, sometimes used flirtatiously
Hand slang often changes in meaning over time, even within the same culture:
Historically, thumbs down means death; now, disapproval or disagreement
Thumb up: historically, let the combatant live; now, okay, good job
Index finger curled to touch the thumb: historically, this meant “okay”; recently, this gesture has become a symbol that the wielder is a white supremacist.
Writers note: The same gesture often has different meanings in different cultures. Use the confusion your advantage when there is a cross-cultural element to your story. Touching the index finger to the thumb means different things all over the world:
You’re a zero – France and Belgium
Money – Japan
@sshole – southern Italy
Sexual invitation – Greece and Turkey
President Nixon caused a scandal in Brazil when he deplaned with both hands overhead in the American peace sign, which in Brazil is equivalent to flipping someone the bird.
Gendered Gestures
By middle school/early adolescence, gender differences in the use of gestures emerge. Some gestures are used equally by both males and females.
Thumbs protruding from pockets: dominance and self-assuredness
Gesturing/pointing to someone with the thumb: dismissive, disrespectful, ridiculing
Women more likely to use this gesture with people they dislike
Males
Give “the finger”
Give the finger with an upward arm more to convey “up yours”
Pound the table
Pound a fist into the opposite hand
Display clenched fists
Use expansive, powerful hand movements
Use adaptors less frequently (see below)
Holding jacket lapel with thumbs exposed: dominant and self-assuredness
Females
Put their hands in their laps or on their hips
Tap their hands on the table or on their leg
Pull in their gestures as if their elbows are attached to their waists
Use more “bonding” gestures, such as hands and arms outstretched toward another person
Be more expressive, more animated in their use of gestures
Use low steepled finger position (see below)
Place one hand over the other and rest her chin on top, drawing attention to the face
Writers portraying a person of the other sex heed this: getting body language wrong—in this case hand talk—makes your character come across as unreal or unbelievable.
Professional Gestures
Several professions require conveying information through hand gestures that fall outside the structure of a formalized language. People in these professions tend to remain cognizant of their hand movements and position even when not working. Some make an effort to minimize or completely still their hands, while others are especially prone to enhance their communication with conscious hand gestures.
Musical conductors often subconsciously cue other speakers even when off the stage. Conductors are trained to use their left and right hands simultaneously to make completely independent movements, signalling the tempo and style with the right hand and controlling musicians’ entrances and overall tone with the left.
Classical dance traditions in India, Bali, Japan, and many other regions include a “vocabulary” of hand signs. These signs are not a formalized language like ASL, but they are used in combination with the music to create a message or tell a story physically embodied by the movements of the entire body.
Romani dancers have a much less formal dance style, and it is common for individual dancers or families to create or adjust their own lexicon of hand movements. These gestures often reflect activities in daily life. Unlike Indian or Balinese dancers, Romani dancers’ footwork and figures tends to be relatively simple.
Ballet, and many offshoot lyrical dance styles, uses hand gestures either to extend the movement of their arms or to communicate story elements via pantomime.
Gestures as Adaptors
Adaptors are almost always learned in childhood, typically involving touching oneself, for the purpose of self-soothing. Often people exhibit only one such behavior/habit, but an individual could have multiples. For example, pulling on an ear, tapping toes, smoothing eyebrows, touching nose or chin, bouncing a knee, twisting fingers, picking at one’s nails, twirling hair, and brushing hair back. Adaptors can include adjusting clothing (e.g., pulling on/straightening a tie), fiddling with jewelry, pocket change, or a pencil, and drumming one’s fingers.
Important things about using/exhibiting adaptors:
They attract attention, detracting from the verbal communication and/or annoying others
They are often interpreted as signs of anxiety
They make the exhibitor less persuasive
Writers note: There are lots of ways to show anxiety or nervousness without telling the reader that is what is being felt.
What the hands say is often louder than words. Research by Joe Navarro’s and others supports this conclusion.
When people hide their hands (for example, under a table or desk) they are perceived as less open and less honest.
How we touch someone reveals how we feel about them: full touch with the palm is warm and affectionate; touching with fingertips shows less affection.
When people feel comfortable and strong, fingers are spread out more, making hands more territorial.
When feeling insecure, people’s fingers are closer, sometimes thumbs tucked into palms.
Steepled fingers: when held high, feeling confident; low steepled fingers signal the person is listening, attending.
When feeling confident, thumbs rise more as the person speaks, especially if fingers are intertwined.
Two gestures express extreme stress: the Teepee Finger rub (palms facing, fingers interlaced and held stiff or rubbed slowly back and forth; and fingers intertwined palms facing up.
When adults’ words don’t match their gestures they are seen as less trustworthy.
Hands clenched together: scared, nervous, or holding back a strong negative emotion.
Position is important: in front of face, on desk or lap, in front of genitals when standing; in general, the higher the clenched fists, the stronger the negative emotion.
Hand behind the back, one hand gripped in the other: superiority and confidence.
Arms back, one hand gripping wrist: holding back frustration, a gesture of self-control.
Get a grip on yourself?—Arms back, one hand gripping the other arm: the higher up the hand grips the opposite arm, the more frustrated or angry the person is likely to be.
Writers be aware: mismatching words and hand movements is a powerful tool.
Pay attention to handshakes. Because a handshake is often the first touch between people, it shapes first impressions.
No one likes vice-like grips, which convey aggressiveness, perhaps an attempt to intimidate or establish dominance.
A limp handshake does not denote femininity, but rather weakness.
Body language experts suggest mirroring the other person’s handshake, with good eye contact.
NB: In some cultures a hug or cheek-kissing might be more in order.
Talking With One’s Hands Isn’t a Bad Thing
An analysis of TED talks found that the most popular speakers used nearly twice as many hand gestures as the least popular speakers.
People who talk with their hands tend to be viewed as warm, agreeable and energetic.
People who use their hands less are seen as logical, cold and analytical.
According to Kinsey Gorman, “Gesturing can help people form clearer thoughts, speak in tighter sentences, and use more declarative language.”
Hand gestures often tell others the strength of our emotions and motivations.
Young children (age 5 or 6) using more hand gestures predicts a strong vocabulary as well ask sills related to sentence structure and storytelling later.
Bottom line for writers: Hand movements and gestures allow you to convey so much information to your readers:
Show not tell emotions and attitudes
Add depth to your character
Add power to your dialogue
Break up big chunks of narrative or dialogue in meaningful ways
