I recently wrote a blog on CUT THE FLAB and since then, I’ve been noting the various and sundry ways writers irritate readers—or perhaps I should say, this reader.
Going off-key on tone. This is when something just doesn’t feel right. It is especially likely when reading something supposedly set in an early time which contains language that is too modern. For example, a story is set in 1812 that contains references to teenagers and babysitting. It’s also common when using slang that is inappropriate to the time of the story or the age of the character: totally awesome, gag me with a spoon, and grody to the max scream the 1980s. An important part of tone is choosing the right form of a word—as in spittle if you want it to seem older, spit if you want it to be more modern.
Close but no cigar: Using the wrong word. Fiancé (masculine) versus fiancée (feminine). Blond (masculine) versus blonde (feminine)—although recently there is a trend toward going with blond for both. That/who: Use who for humans. “The man that walked in” is totally wrong. That should be for objects or animals, as in “The cat that ate the cream.” And/but: and connects two things that are in the same vein while but signals a turn. “She stifled a grin and spoke sympathetically” gives a different impression from “She spoke sympathetically but stifled a grin.” The former sounds sympathetic, the latter hypocritical.
Who/whom:whom always needs to be preceded by a preposition, such as by, for, of, to, etc. Who is without a preposition. So, “The man who came to dinner,” but “For whom the bell tolls.” Imply/infer: a speaker implies something but it’s the listener or observer who infers. Sit/set: a person, animal, or object sits in a resting position; sets is the act of putting something in that position. She sets the vase on the table and then it just sits there. What/which: “That what he would not dare” is wrong.
Redundant verbiage: I talked about this in the blog on flab, but here are some recent versions. Minutes/seconds don’t need modifiers: A brief second or a long minute are no-no’s. Expansive in the large magnitude. I resumed the previous ideas that… I wanted to stomp the floor with my foot.
This sort of irritation can do much to undermine what is basically a good storyline or plot. On the other hand: This is Act Happy Week, so maybe it’s time to put irritation aside!
On March 18, 1817, Jane Austen wrote (and dated) her last lines of fiction. She had begun the work on January 27, 1817, and in less than two months had written some 23,000 words! That alone is enough for me to put her on a pedestal. She has been a favorite author of mine since college.
Austen had not titled her unfinished novel but it has come to be known as Sanditon, named for the location of the story. The unfinished manuscript was first published in 1925 and is still in print.
The March 13, 2017 issue of The New Yorker has a well-written and informative article (need I even say that about a New Yorker article?) about the book, with biographical notes on Austen.
According to Anthony Lane, Sanditon is filled with Austen’s signature humor, wit, and unerring eye for human folly—in this case, focusing on a town full of hypochondriacs. He also comments, “Austen knew as well as anybody that, in the long run, hypochondriacs aren’t wrong. They’re just early.”
At least seven writers have finished Sanditon—according to Lane, with varying degrees of success. No doubt some of these are available.
Austen died four months after penning her last fiction lines, on July 18, 1817. The cause of her death is still debated, perhaps Addison’s disease, perhaps Hodgkin’s disease. Lane calls her last book an “exercise in courage.” I’ve just ordered it!
Earlier this week a writing friend of mine, Fiona Quinn, invited people on Facebook to share their pet peeves. I shared two, one of which was characters who nod their heads. Perhaps I lack imagination, but I can’t think what else a person might nod. Shaking one’s head is a completely different matter, for all sorts of things—some of them body parts—can be shaken.
Which brings me to today’s blog. I get really annoyed with flabby writing—writing that includes unnecessary words or phrases. I’ll talk about four common types of flab: stating something for which there is no alternative, saying the same thing twice, naming characters or relationships already known, and stating an action that is inherent in another action.
Stating something for which there is no alternative. A character nodding his head is one of these. Here’s more flab.
She rose to her feet. She stood up. She sat down. A bouquet of flowers he had gathered himself, by hand. He thought to himself. Who else could he think to? The usual or inevitable need not be stated, only the exceptions.For example, if she stood aside it isn’t redundant.
Writing redundantly. In such a short span of time. At this point in time. He hesitated for a quick minute. With sudden haste. She quickly tore open the letter. Bickering back and forth. Opening a letter, “Now I shall see what my father thinks in his letter.”
Naming characters or relationships known to the characters and the readers. “The toll taken on him, her father, a man who…” “Your invitation to my sister, Kitty…” “Boasted to Mrs. Johnson, your mother…” “Turned to her husband, David…”
Writing an action that is inherent in another action. “He stood and walked to the door.” Can one walk to a door without standing? “She started the car and drove away.” “He took the pot from the stove and served the potatoes.”
And then there is writing that just makes no sense. He inwardly exhaled?
The bottom line: All sorts of unnecessary words and actions slip into writing, especially first drafts. Cut them mercilessly. One good exercise is to try to shorten every paragraph by a line, or every sentence by a word. He rushed to the door is much stronger than he walked quickly to the door—and it’s more concise.
One of the best things you can do for yourself as a writer is to join a writing group or workshop. The people you meet can offer fresh perspectives on your writing and help you evolve in your genre and beyond. Not only is it great to have another set of eyes look over your work, but going to a workshop every week helps you stick to a regular writing schedule. That discipline, coupled with the skills you pick up, are a great way to bring your writing to the next level.
I had no formal writing instruction from high school through retirement, but after I retired I began to take classes at the VMFA Studio School. In addition to all sorts of arts classes– drawing and painting, photography, pottery, printmaking– they offer creative writing courses. Coming up soon are two such courses: one in memoir writing, and another in blog writing.
Besides the classes at the VMFA, I’ve had classes and/or workshops at the University of Richmond and, of course, Nimrod Hall Summer arts programs. Registration for Nimrod is already open for week-long or weekend workshops, if you’re interested.
I’ve also had friends who’ve taken classes at VCU. They are difficult to get into for non-degree students, but it doesn’t hurt to try. While the types of courses vary from semester to semester, here is a list of upcoming courses they will be offering.
A writing friend took a seminar with Agile Writers which she said was excellent. You can take their mini-tutorials online, or become a member for more benefits. Still others have taken classes at the Visual Arts Center. They currently have a couple of open classes: Writing from Your Senses and Writing the Memoir. Sometimes you can find classes or workshops at local libraries. I once taught a 6-week class at the Tuckahoe Branch of Henrico County Library. Such opportunities are catch-as-catch-can, but be aware!
There are also workshops set up for you to make contacts within the writing community and to help you get feedback on your writing. One such event is Writers Wednesdays through the James River Writers, where on the second Wednesday of every month writers in Richmond have a casual meet-and-greet at Ardent Craft Ales. Similarly, Writers Farmhouse invites authors to the Midlothian Urban Farmhouse Market & Cafe to write, read, and motivate.
If you start taking writing instruction, you are likely to fall in love with your teacher. By all means, continue to take classes with her/him. But also branch out. I’ve taken classes with Douglas Jones, Susan Hankla, Sherri Reynolds, Cathy Hankla, Charlotte Morgan, and others. Valley Haggard is also a local writer who offers classes. James River Writers has a list of classes, workshops, and writing groups for you to get more info about these opportunities.
Each teacher offers something; they all have their strengths. Some light a creative spark. Some provide structure to get started and/or finish a specific project. Some sharpen specific writing skills. Some offer assignments and deadlines that make you keep BIC (Butt in Chair) and actually put words on paper. All should offer encouragement and support!
A horrendous bout of bronchitis has plagued me for weeks, going from bad to worse. I’m talking about coughing so long, hard, and often that my entire ribcage ached. I’m talking about such congestion that every time I changed positions, I could hear as well as feel fluids sloshing around in my lungs and sinuses, and would cough all the more. I’m talking about flushed face and frigid fingers. I’m talking about no energy, and sleeping (albeit poorly) twenty hours a day, till my whole body felt stiff and sore from lack of movement. (Yes, oh, poor me!)
At times like these, I like cold drinks, something warm and cozy to wrap up in, and no body bugging me with, “How are you feeling?” And as I sleep less and ache less, I like comfort reads.
A prime requirement for my sickbed reading is familiarity. Hence, Jane Austen is a go-to choice. I know what’s going to happen and that all anguish will come to naught. I can even get this sort of read with a Jane Austen fan fiction variation. The characters remain the same and the action is still low-key. Which brinks me to another criterion for sickbed reading…
A second criterion for my good sickbed read is that it be low-key. Absolutely no action/adventure here. Consider Markham and Bryson. I want the emotion to be relatively mild and generally upbeat.
[Source: Tui Books]
I’m not alone in these criteria. I have a granddaughter who recently reread Harry Potter while ill, and her sister reread the Wings of Fire series. Various friends and acquaintances go off in various directions. Here are some of the most popular, returned to again and again.
I’ve turned the corner on this bronchitis—I hope and trust. I’m ready to rebuild my sickbed shelf for next time. What do you read when you’re sick? I’d love to know.
[Source: printablecalendar.com]Yes, March 3 is International Ear Care Day. It’s also Bonza Bottler Day—the day of the month when the number of the day is the same as the number of the month—which is as good an excuse for a party as any. But it is so much more than these! March is rife with awareness and celebration, and these are golden opportunities for writers. Celebrations make excellent background for conflict, humor, intrigue, and the revelation of character.
Here, for your writing and partying pleasure, is a list:
Allport Syndrome Awareness Month coincides with National Kidney Month to raise awareness of kidney disease and the benefits of organ donation.
American Red Cross Month, to make people aware of the activities and programs of approximately 600 offices nationwide.
Celebrate Your Name Week (first full week in March), to honor your name and make sure it is a respected part of your personhood.
Colic Awareness Month, to educate parents on safer soothing techniques. Colic is defined as an otherwise healthy baby crying for three or more hours a day, three or more days a week, for three or more weeks in a row.
Colorectal Cancer Education and Awareness Month, focusing on the need for early diagnosis, education, and treatment.
Credit Education Month, designed to remind people of the need to develop skills needed to manage their finances efficiently and effectively.
Employee Spirit Month urges employers to do things to raise the spirits of their employees. Duh! Apparently holiday office parties aren’t enough.
Mad For PlaidMonth: We think of plaid as originating in the British Isles, but it was really in Central Europe in the sixth century BCE. Consider more than Black Watch. Go for madras, gingham, check, as well as tartan.
Malignant Hypothermia Awareness and Training Month: Malignant hypothermia is is a reaction to commonly used volatile gaseous anesthesia, and untreated can kill a person within minutes.
Music in Our Schools Month to increase public awareness and support of music as part of a balanced curriculum.
National Caffeine Awareness Month is intended to reduce dependence on caffeine.
National Cheerleading Week (1-7)—exactly what the name says.
National Clean Up Your IRS Act Month is to focus on resolving problems with the IRS.
National Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month—exactly what the name says.
National Craft Month lauds the fun and creativity of crafts and hobbies.
National Eye Donor Month: You can figure this one out! Coincides with Save Your Vision Month and Workplace Eye Wellness Month.
National Frozen Food Monthtouts convenience, quality, and nutrition.
National Multiple Sclerosis Education and Awareness Month: The aim is compassion as well as awareness.
National Nutrition Month—as if anyone doesn’t know about the importance of nutrition for good or ill!
National Peanut Month promotes peanuts in all their glory, from in the shell to pie. (I have an excellent recipe for peanut pie from ThePeanut Cookbook.)
National Procrastination Week (1-7) celebrates the benefits of procrastination—but might also interfere with other activities of the month!
National Umbrella Month honors one of the most versatile and underrated inventions of all time.
National Women’s History Month celebrating women’s contributions and achievements that are too often overlooked or ignored.
National Write A Letter of Appreciation Week (1-7), though I suppose in this day and age, an email of appreciation is more likely.
Optimism Month: Research documents that optimists have better health, greater prosperity, and are happier than pessimists.
Play-The-Recorder Monthbrings public performances in places such as libraries, bookstores, museums, and shopping malls. You might even find a workshop on playing the recorder.
Poison Prevention Awareness Month is for the prevention of accidental poisoning.
Professional Pet Sitters Week (first full week in March): Yes, people really do make a living this way. Imagine the opportunities for everything, from romance to murder!
Read an E-Book Week:Self explanatory. Why not try Different Drummer?
Return the Borrowed Books Week: Think personal loans as well as libraries.
Sing With Your Child Month promotes families singing, dancing, and making music together.
Social Work Month celebrates the services social workers provide to vulnerable populations.
Telecommuter Appreciation Week focuses on the benefits to workers, families, employers, and society.
Vascular Anomalies Awareness Month includes hemangioma, malformations, and tumors. Who knew?
Youth Art Month promoting the value and importance of art and art education for children and youths.
Should you accept the challenge of writing a March scene, story, or poem based on something in this list, you can find out more about any or all of them online. Cheers!
This past weekend I participated in a Facebook Hop to help promote the 50 Shades of Cabernet mystery anthology which is about to be published. It was a first for me. People were encouraged to hop from one FB page to the next and register for whatever that person was offering. It seems to have been very popular.
My giveaway was signed copies of my books. In order to qualify, I asked people to answer the question, “If you could be reincarnated as any writer, any time, anywhere, who would it be? Why?” Given that this was associated with a mystery anthology, it isn’t surprising that many people cited mystery writers. But not all! Here, in alphabetical order, are all the writers mentioned.
Jane Austen—who can count the reasons?
Agatha Christie—a classic choice by several for reasons from youth reading, to she went to exotic places, to she solved crimes before technology
Beverly Cleary—even though she’s still alive
Blaise Clement—b/c her pet sitting books are great
Jackie Collins—b/c her books are fun
Michael Creighton—b/c the reader learns something new in every book
Tim Dorsey—b/c he seems to really enjoy his life
James D. Doss—writes clean mysteries with hilarious acerbic asides
Jessica Fletcher—b/c she is fictional and will live forever!
Dick Francis—b/c he got to ride horses, worked for the Queen, and lived a long life
Robert Frost—b/c his poetry is wonderful
Homer—and who needs a reason?
Colleen Hoover—b/c she is just damned AWESOME
P.D. James—insert your own reasons
Carolyn Keene—b/c she was a favorite youth read (for more than one responder)
Alexander McCall Smith—b/c he’s charming, witty, and down-to-earth (listed here b/c his last name is McCall Smith)
Margaret Mitchell—b/c of Gone With the Wind and loving the Civil War
L. M. Montgomery—b/c she lived on Prince Edward Island
Edgar Allen Poe—b/c of his fascinating imagination
Mary Roberts Rinehart—b/c she was such an interesting woman
Nora Roberts—b/c I love her book
J. K. Rowling—right before she became famous for Harry Potter
Ann Rule—b/c she has a really special mindset
Dr. Seuss—b/c of his wonderful imagination
Anna Sewell—wrote Black Beauty, etc.
J. R. R. Tolkien—b/c he has a rich imagination
Laura Ingalls Wilder—b/c she wrote what she lived
Virginia Woolf—b/c she felt so deeply and expressed those feelings wonderfully
I’ve edited some of the responses to fit the “because” format, but tried to keep the meaning. All of these come recommended. Why not pick up an author you haven’t read?
During my first trip abroad, I was amused to learn that Europeans make a distinction between speaking English and speaking American. No doubt I was just naive. This was before I started collecting dictionaries, or surely I would have noticed.
It was sometime later that I read Bill Bryson’s wonderful book The Mother Tongue: English and HowIt Got That Way.
Bryson leads us on a wonderful romp through English from the beginnings of language to its future. It’s a laugh-out-loud read, but fair warning: there is a lot of information here. My sister-in-law never finished it, she said because she could never remember all that detail. I read it for the laughs and the big picture, so no problem.
Bryson’s book was published in 1990, and it’s still a great read. Richard W. Bailey’s Speaking American was published in 2012, and is more focused. As you can see from the Table of Contents, he follows a timeline by exploring key cities. Bailey was a long-time professor at the University of Michigan, and his book is academically solid—but it’s very accessible and much more entertaining than you might expect!
So why did I start this blog with an image of Speaking American?Because this is a book writers can use as well as enjoy! As the cover indicates, it is a visual guide. In Speaking American* How Y’all, Youse, and You Guys Talk, Josh Katz highlights some of the myriad quirks of American English and literally shows you where people talk that way.
For example, he gives the big picture of where people say drinking fountain versus water fountain, but also the really weird spots (my label) in Michigan and New England where they say bubbler. Think what a delightful detail that could be if you have a scene set in a bubbler locale.
You can glean other helpful details as well. For example, besides knowing where, in general, people say firefly rather than lightning bug, you can also get down to very specific locales.
And you can choose a label according to the time when your story is set.
I grew up saying lightning bug. I mourn that they seem on their way to language extinction.
Finally, by cross-referencing, you can learn whether the same people who are likely to cut the grass (as opposed to mow the lawn or mow the grass) are likely to be wearing tennis shoes, gym shoes, or sneakers; would refresh themselves with soda, pop, or coke (not necessarily Coke); and spend time catching crayfish or crawdads. This book is a writer’s delight. Even if you don’t need or want it to write authentic dialogue, it’s a fun read and is likely to make you appreciate even more the nuance in the stories you read.
Here’s a name you should know: Alexander McCall Smith. He is a British author—a prolific British author—born in Zimbabwe, best known for his #1 Ladies’ Detective Agency series. The series features Precious Ramotswe and contains 17 books to date, all set in Botswana. Some of these were presented on HBO.
My sister-in-law lived in this area of Africa for seven years, and she said the depictions are absolutely authentic. But McCall is so much more than one series! His writing is excellent, his characters grab your heart, he uses lots of humor, and he’s an all-around feel-good read!
Set in Edinburgh, the 44 Scotland Street series contains 11 novels, with wonderful people portraits and gentle satire. Bertie is the center of it all.
Also set in Edinburgh, The Sunday Philosophy Club series, featuring Isobel Dalhousie, contains 14 books. Isobel is a professional philosopher and amateur sleuth. USA TODAY said “Isobel is a force to be reckoned with.” NEWSWEEK said, “Remarkable. . . [Isobel] is such good copany, it’s hard to believe she is fictional.”
Professor Dr. Von Igelfeld is the somewhat bumbling academic sleuth in the Portuguese Irregular Verbs series. Only 4 books to date, but we can hope for more. I don’t know what McCall’s experiences are with his setting in Germany, but he certainly nailed the academic politics and atmosphere!
So far there are 3 books in the Corduroy Mansions series. The location is Pimlico; the cast of characters are the residents of Corduroy Mansions, plus McCall Smith’s first canine star, Freddie de la Hay.
McCall Smith has written 5 books in two series for children: School Ship Tobermory Children’s Series and the Precious Children’s Series/Precious Ramotswe Mysteries for Young Readers.
As if all of that were not enough, Alexander McCall Smith has published 11 stand-alone books, set in various times and places. For example, Dream Angus is set in twentieth-century Scotland. Dream Angus comes at night bestowing dreams. He’s also the god of love, youth and beauty. Magical realism, anyone?
TWO REASONS TO READ ALEXANDER McCALL SMITH: 1) If you like series, you can stick with him for a long time, and 2) if you are a writer, skip hither and yon among his offerings to sample one writer’s diversity.
It wasn’t a dark and stormy night, but a week ago tonight was perfect for murder. For the second year, Sisters in Crime/Central Virginia worked with Clover Hill Library for their Friends of the Library fundraiser, Murder at the Library.
I can’t rave too much about this event. It was very well organized. For one thing, they provided a sleuth’s notebook that included photos and thumbnail sketches of the potential suspects. In addition, it contained the program, author photos, and bios.
The skit ended with the discovery of the body.
Then attendees mingled with the suspects, asking questions, gathering more info. Here you see me taking with the Branch Manager who had “borrowed” money from library funds to pay for her expensive red scarf. This would be the same scarf found near the body.
Then there were the lecherous president of the Friends of the Library rejected by the victim and the library gossip who knew the victim since college and held a grudge.
This famous children’s singer was the victim’s lover and an all around not-so-nice guy. Jeanette was grumpy because she hated change, and expected to get her old job back now that the librarian who had replaced her was dead.
And let’s not forget those not pictured! Pokemon Go Guy, two boozing mom’s on Xanax and wine, the singer’s sister, and Detective Nancy Drew who called on those present to help find the person who had motive, means, and opportunity.
Votes were cast by tossing legos into the labeled bin of the suspect one favored, and reasons were given for the suspicions. I’m proud to say, I was right! (And no, I won’t name the killer.)
Several of the authors presented a discussion of the sub-genre’s of mysteries: Mary Miley, Maggie King, Heather Weidner, Tina Glasneck, Fiona Quinn, and LynDee Walker. Rosemary Shomaker and I facilitated the sleuthing.
Besides the pleasure of all the murder and mayhem, a ticket to this event allowed attendees to have heavy hors d’ oeuvres, beer, wine, and soft drinks. Watch for notices of the event next year and to be sure you don’t miss it, get your tickets early!
