My much-loved sister flew in to stay with me for a wonderful four days—our first time together in years! We talked and talked and talked some more: spouses, extended family, children and grandchildren, frustrations, gardening, everyone’s health and well-being, books, cars, my writing…

My sister is considerate and eager to be helpful. We celebrated my birthday. In short, it couldn’t have been a better visit.

On the drive home after dropping her off at the airport, I started a mental to-do list. And I realized that there is always a downside to houseguests. The slope and extent of the downside varies with how many people have come and how compatible they are, but there’s always something. In short, every silver lining has a cloud!

At the Minimum

• Extra sheets and towels—and maybe napkins—to launder
• Remaking the guest bed(s)
• Resetting the table(s) for permanent residents only

Depending on the Host’s Circumstances

• Returning furniture to its former place/function, for example, having moved chairs so that everyone can see the TV
• Putting away cots or sleeping bags
• Catching up on work neglected during the visit
• Doing laundry for the guest(s) during the visit
• Dealing with leftovers or specially-purchased foods after departure
• Transportation to/from airport, bus terminal, or train station
• Arranging parking for guest vehicle

Compatibility with Houseguests

Sometimes, the houseguests and hosts do not quite match each others’ energy.

• Distinctly different political or social viewpoints can affect everything from what topics are discussed to which news programs are watched or even result in more-or-less hostile “discussions.”
• If one is religious and the other isn’t, one or the other must compromise on prayer in the home and attendance at services.
• Sometimes one is go-go and the other is essentially a slug.
• Sometimes one talks while the other is trying to read, listen to the news, or watch a particular TV show.
• When one is a night owl and the other is an early bird, it affects everything from scheduling of activities and amusements to the timing of meals.
• Food restrictions or preferences can often lead to friction
  • Firm or soft scrambled eggs, regular or decaf coffee, fruit vs. juice, vegan/vegetarian vs. meat eaters, etc.

Hazards Beyond Anyone’s Control

• Planned activities must be cancelled because of rain, heat, or snow
• Someone needs medical attention for a fall, allergic reaction, or sudden illness
• Automobile accident, even if not catastrophic

Houseguests Who are All Downside

And then there are houseguests who are just “bad.” They…

• Without prior discussion, expect the host to supply everything from sun hats to sleepwear to toiletries
• Raid refrigerator or cupboard and snack on something needed for a meal
• Take over the host’s preferred chair or place at the table
• Make unreasonable demands for food, activities, accommodations, etc.
• Take possession of the TV remote or the daily newspaper
• Ask the host for money or to purchase something rather than wait for an offer
• Put their feet on the furniture, shoes on
• Take a book from the host’s “to-be-read” stack and ask to take it with them when they leave. Or presume rather than ask.
  

With this last category, you might well ask yourself, “Can I avoid ever having this person in my home again?”

Bottom Line: When it comes to houseguests, consider whether the upside is worth the downside!